Joseph’s Blog – josephrodgers.com

2003

It’s sophomore year of college. I’m sitting at a pow wow circle in my dorm room. There’s a bottle of Jager and Southern Comfort in the middle of the circle. Real relevant shit is playing on the pc. You better believe it’s Outkast -  The Love Below & Speakerboxx. An anthem for a college semester. Listen to Ghetto Musik on Speakerboxx and I dare you to not get crunk.

 

2010

Fast forward to 2010. Big Boi is at it again. He just dropped a bombshell LP titled Sir Lucious Left Foot: The Son of Chico Dusty. Yes, that is the most badass record title I’ve ever heard. Do not doubt me. 

 

 

Here’s the track list:

 

Feel Me (Intro)

Daddy Fat Sax

Turns Me On (ft. Sleepy Brown & Joi)

Follow Us (ft. Vonnegutt)

Shutterbugg (ft. Cutty)

General Patton (ft. Big Rube)

Tangerine (ft. T.I. & Khujo)

You Ain’t No DJ (ft. Yelawolf)

Hustle Blood (ft. Jamie Foxx)

Be Still (ft. Janelle Monae)

Fo Yo Sorrows (ft. George Clinton, Too Short & Sam Chris)

Night Night (ft. B.oB. & Joi)

Shine Blockas (ft. Gucci Mane)

The Train Part II ( Sir Lucious Left Foot Save the Day) [Ft. Sam Chris]

Back Up Plan

Theme Song

Shine Blockas (Remix) [ft. Gucci Mane, Bun B & Project Pat]

 

The Intro is sick, the bass hits hard as hell. General Patton starts out with a choir then you hear that wonderful fast southern beat and more bass. Tangerine is next in line. You will not be disappointed. A little slower, but damn it makes me want a tangerine or anything that rhymes with it. I got a feeling Big Boi calls women whatever the fuck he wants. Hustle Blood with Jamie Foxx, I hate R&B, but he sounds real badass. Lyrics are kinda deep. Not like emo deep. Fo Yo Sorrows has George Fucking Clinton, should I say more? You know it’s funky. Finally is Shine Blockas remix. It’s got my hometown hero Project Pat. The whole track is killer.

 

Present Like Right Now

 

Are you ready to eargasm? Are your ears dripping wet? Go rip this shit. Head over to the Tunesday download page. 

 

We fucking twitter too:

Rinky Dink Records

WOP

Joer

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Arms and shoulders, improvements in wert exercise. I brought it X style. An ripper was a real motherfucker but I prevailed. 2.2 mile jog down to Chester and back.
I shaved my pathetic facial hair except the stache. It looks boss. Lunch: 2 eggs over easy, left over brat, 1/2 serving black beans. Snack: Post workout protein

Dinner: small chicken salad from US Pizza, 1 vodka tonic, 1/2 leftover ribeye.

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Plyometrics mama Mia. Yesterday was chest and back, I ate good and stayed on track. Took a 2 mile jog. Felt good and rehab leg pain was minimal. Tuna salad for lunch, protein shake, brats and veggies for dinner.

Today Plyometrics

Lunch was one brat and a supplement shake. Protein shake post workout an ribeye with veggies for dinner.

My lower back, feet, and knees were sore today. I proactively chose to ice my joints. I’ve got leftover ribeye for mañana and that is a good thing. I’m gunning for monster improvements tomorrow.

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This just happened at Yankee Doodle Andy’s. Don’t be J.

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Dear Diary,

It’s really important that you take a long hard look at… me. Would you look at this fucking portrait already. You did know I live in Brooklyn? You did know i got millions? I got so much swag I choose to look like hammered shit. My gawdy jewelry, look at it. Serious. You think whore, I mean Ashley, can pull this shit off? Think again. She is so far up what’s his name’s ass that she uses his pencil dick for a curling iron. I’m right. 

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Check out the side boob… OMFG BARF FFFUUU WTF!

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Give up NOW. Call it quits. Forget your dreams. THIS INFOGRAPHIC!

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We’re 2-0 tied with Sex Panthers. We play at 3:45 Field 4. This is a legit ball park instead of a grassy field. Get out there 30 min early. Love,
Broseph

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Weather in Little Rock was amazing today. I strayed into a restaurant today for my first time since Sunday. I tried to keep it as healthy as possible. Workout today was Yoga X. Now I’m not the most macho fuck out there but I was skeptical. Let me tell you, Yoga X was no joke. I sweated so fucking hard. 1.5 hours of glory. I think this workout will definitely help my core and balance.

NOMNOM
Breakfast – none, woke up at 11am
Lunch – Flying Burrito, chicken salad – bed of lettuce, shredded chicken, cooked onions, lime salsa, fresh japs, black beans, corn, pico. Snack – post workout 1.25 scoop protein shake
Dinner – bed of lettuce, chicken breast, 4 scoops mashed potatoes. That’s it folks. Legs and Back mañana.

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All you Memphis pricks going to Pretty Lights tonight… suck it. I’ll be in Little Rock pondering important shit. I downloaded the Pretty LIghts discography and an unreleased EP called Electro City. I can certainly dig it but you must remember that I have superior taste in music. 

Electro City

So far my favorite track is #5, features a little Yael Naim/B Spears Toxic and Ludacris up in that bitch. If you’ve ever heard Girl Talk, it kinda reminds me of that shit, just a little more focused and a little less High School Cheerleader Routine.

Here’s an excerpt from Last.fm

In the fall of ‘07, Derek began performing in venues around northern Colorado beside live drummer, Adam Deitch, with the desire to showcase new solo material intended more for the live setting/dance culture. This combination has pushed the envelope of live electronic music and continues to evolve the sound encompassed by the PL collective.

 

Clickity Clack your way over to the Tunesday Download page for some sweet download love.

We fucking twitter too:

Rinky Dink Records

WOP

Joer

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I read a lot of blogs and The Art of Manliness is among my favorites. They post all kinds of articles on being a good man. They write some inspiring content, from treating a lady right to sartorial advice. Recently, however, they hit a nerve with me. Their recent article, Facebook Etiquette, linked to another website where the full article was posted.

The article is written by Brett McKay, mmmkay.My first thoughts were, “okay let’s hear what they have to say.” 

 

I’m gonna share some excerpts from the article, my thoughts will follow.

It should go without saying: gentlemen and ladies only use Facebook. 
MySpace is for cads and scallywags.

Are you fucking kidding me? Brett, you must really have your head up your ass. This makes as much sense as gentlemen and ladies only don’t use condoms. 

Use discretion when wall posting. 
Do not use Facebook’s wall to have entire conversations. You’ll look like a boob if you do…

This is one of my favorite past times. Entire conversations on a “friends” wall. Targeting said “friend” with anecdotes from the past. 

Keep photos of yourself to a minimum. 
Especially photos taken of yourself by yourself, by holding the camera away from your face. Gentleman and ladies are modest and discreet…

My best profile pics are self taken. This might be because I don’t have friends IRL or maybe because my “friends” don’t think I’m photo worthy. Some of my favorite Facebook “friends”* take the best pics in the mirror of themselves. 

Remove compromising photos of yourself. 
If you’re a true gentleman or lady, you shouldn’t have to worry about any incriminating photos of you winding up on Facebook…

This is like saying catholic priests do not touch boys. None of them, never. Or like saying “I don’t think Miley Cyrus is hot, not now, never.” Fact is that people do stupid shit and they should be held accountable. i think the author is hiding something or this is a desperate plea for someone to with hold blackmail content.

My Obvious Bropinion

This guy sounds like a real cheesedick for writing this. No, a fucking elitist cheesedick. He must have forgotten the main reason the internet was made, FOR PORN. I bet this asshole private browses so Kate doesn’t search his web history. Sack up Brett. Let us not forget the rules of the internet.

Rule 8. There are no real rules about posting

Rule 34. There is porn of it, no exceptions

Rule 20. Nothing is to be taken seriously

Rule 42. Nothing is sacred

 

Serious, fuck etiquette, have fun, post all kinds of shit. Facebook would be a boring shit hole without funny pics, prick comments, and lack of discretion. I think you will like The Art of Manliness but he’s wrong on this… because I’m right.

 

Comments Assholes?

 

We fucking twitter too:

Rinky Dink Records

WOP

Joer

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You may have tried craft beer but have you tried craft spirits? Little Rock is home to one of the nation's newest craft spirit makers, Rock Town Distillery. They are having a world premiere party here in Little Rock. Here's the details:

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Hey Team,

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WTF is Facebook Places?

If you update your iPhone Facebook app you will notice Places right smack dab in the middle of the login screen. Places is a location service for Facebook. In other words, it will probably track your every despicable move. Take a pic, add your location and time and direction you were facing when you snap the pic. Update status, it’ll add your location to a little map or some shit. Throw your fucking privacy right out the window. Cops used to have to get a warrant for this kind of shit and now Zuckerburg is pitching it as a good thing. 

Geeks

 Geeks love this shit. You know they cream over database management and this is a virtual datagasm. Quote me on that shit. But who will this affect besides geeks? 

Bros

Let’s just say you’re at a favorite “bookstore” shopping for said “flashlight” or “weight that shakes”. Let’s also say that Jenny from da Block writes something on your Facebook wall. *Jenny is a fine slampiece you’ve had your eye on* So you promptly reply and wham bam thank you ma’am your location is posted along with the reply. You are now screwed because Jenny can see you are in a “bookstore”. This is a prime example of how Places will harm Bros. On the other hand, let’s say Suzie updates her status “OMG So DrUnK WherE’S A DiCk tO Ride?” *Suzie, also a slampiece you’ve had your eye on* Her said status update has her location pinned to it. What is a Bro to do? Seek that sister out, obviously. 

This is obviously a big deal. All I can say is check your privacy settings and think about how loose you want them. One can only imagine, with a new Facebook rollout, they always turn settings on loose as hell. Protect yourself and think about your privacy. Facebook sure as fuck doesn’t value that shit, do you?

 

We fucking twitter too:

Rinky Dink Records WOP Joer

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I like tennis, especially women’s  tennis. Federer is a bro. Look at this.

 

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There is a massive secret they don’t want you to know about. If you are reading this I am breaking a cardinal sin of the other social network. It’s called Tumblr and the first rule of tumblr is DO NOT TALK ABOUT TUMBLR, especially around Facebookers. Just don’t tell tumbloggers I told you, but it’s radcore. You like cool pics? You like asking random questions to strangers? You like will like this like. This week’s featured tumblogger is trasionbitches. 

According to trasionbitches:

I like:
Post-punk style, the smell of jasmine in Spring, big rings, Kate Moss, making collages, Florence and the Machine, dogs more than cats, thunder & lightning storms, Alice Dellal, shorts with tights, The Clash, vintage stores, doc martens, books, silver more than gold, Erin Wasson, Narcisco Rodriguez perfume, coffee, The Doors, Skins, bad girls, honesty, summer more than winter.

So this lady is from down under, no not Australia, South Africa. She posts dirty skank pics in punk garb, chicks with cigs and generrally dirty ass women pics. They might not have dirty hygiene but they are wearing dirty ass clothes. I fucking love it. Head on over to tumblr, you gotta follow peeps to get the most out of it. Hollar pricks.

We fucking twitter too:

Rinky Dink Records

WOP

Joer

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Hola bromigo! Diary, this is what’s up… I’ve been in the news recently. Society being the hater it is, has been hating on me. You obviiously know how crunk I was in Full House and you also know Im a skinny bitch. Recently I was quoted,

“I think it’s really important to be able to talk when something’s wrong, I learned at a really young age that if you don’t talk about it, it can drive you insane.”

These prick editors at Mary Claire magazine thought I was talking about an eating disorder.  They took that shit out of context. I will give you one guess as to what was wrong was in my life. It starts with “Bitch Ash” and ends with “ley”. Yes, I said it. Yes, I just set that fucking record straight. And speaking of Full House, I wouldn’t wish that shit on any child. Think about it, sharing a character role with a cunt like Ashley. Fuck that. Yeah I lost weight, you would too if you had to live with this bitch. Fuck this. I’m about to crush a few Red Bulls and Ramen. 

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Here’s the thing, I love M.I.A. I root for Maya even when the critics are down on her. All I can say is WTF is this shit stick? 

She dropped a badass bomb with Born Free but XXXO looks like a child got hold of the cheesiest graphic effects and slapped them together. You are so much better than this. Of course maybe you want us to say that, I dunno. I still love you. 

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Don’t you just love that friend of yours, you know the one who has superior taste in music. The one who you want to slap out of their seat. Listen up skipper, I know you love Journey and Rush but it might be time to get up to speed. 

The Black Keys

You’re obviously a bro, so you love Blues and Rock. These guys fucking do it right. Here’s an excerpt from last.fm…

Akron, Ohio, United States (2001 – present)

The Black Keys are a two-man blues-rock group from Akron, Ohio, United States which formed in 2001, consisting of singer and guitarist Dan Auerbach and drummer Patrick Carney. The band name was inspired by a schizophrenic artist and friend in Akron, who used the term “black keys” to describe things he disliked or people he did not trust. The Black Keys have roots in traditional blues and psychedelic rockstylings.

They released their first album, The Big Come Up, in 2002, followed by Thickfreakness in 2003, andRubber Factory in 2004. October 2005 saw the release of the DVD Live, recorded live at The Metro Theatre in Sydney, Australia March 18, 2005. In 2006 they released Magic Potion, as well as the lesser-known Chulahoma and a single version of Your Touch.

One of their trademarks is their preference for simple, lo-fi recording techniques. They refuse to use big-name studios, and do most recording, producing, and mixing themselves. Most ofThickfreakness was recorded in about 14 hours in Carney’s basement, using only an early 80’s Tascam 388 8-track recorder. Often, their recordings still have background noises (such as an owl hooting).

The Black Keys have achieved increasing critical acclaim and recognition since their debut album, which itself received praise from Rolling Stone magazine. Time magazine named them one of the “10 Best Acts of 2003” (behind OutKast and The White Stripes).

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Pirates or Ninjas? On any other day I would be a Pirate, but today my pants got a bit tighter thanks to our good friend Lindsay Lohan. I dunno how Marc Ecko conned her into this epic ninja mask but I like his style. 

You may or may not have heard, he broke out of jail too. She must have paid of the judge cause she’s headed for rehab. What a lucky bitch. Proves the point, if your pockets are deep enough miracles happen. Now look at this pic. Later homos.

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The internet is so weird. You communicate with strangers, it sometimes feels like you are talking to a brick wall. But every once in a while, you meet a motherfucker in real life, IRL. Enter Don Gaines aka Dom. He’s the most vegan prick I’ve ever come across. I don’t really “know” Don but I do run into him here in Little Rock. He’s into social media, twitter, bloggin and most importantly Tumblr.

So what? 

This guy’s important. He is a bona-fide sneaker head, I have a feeling he is sponsored by @rockcitykicks. He’s a crackerjack designer. I’ve seen him order a vegan burger at Midtown Billiards, the most non vegan place to get a burger in the world, WORLD. Anyways, you might dig his tumblr, it isn’t the most frequently updated tumblog out there but the content is class. Beware, if you stumble upon his last.fm account you will be sucked into a cry baby emo blackhole. Keep it real playas.

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I’m driving in the Delta, obviously Facebooking while driving. Just posted some food pics and decide to see what twitter has to offer. Tweet this and tweet that. Then @BroBible pops up in my feed. FYI, http://www.brobible.com is the authority on topics relevant to bro’s such as yourself. So I’m furiously reading the tweet and I see one of my top 5 dream slammies on the list, Emma Watson a.k.a Hermione sp. The tweet says Emma, new haircut, and has a list. I know this can’t be good. The link is already clicked and loading.

I’m sweating at this point but it might be from the Spicy Chick-Fil-A sandwich halfway down the hatch. It’s not the sammie, but the sudden fear of what I might see upon the page. BroBible mobile loads and there she is.

First thought… my boner named Emma is gone. WTF. Calm down Joe. I start breathing deeply to get a hold of myself. I splash a little sweet tea in my face, I’m not dreaming. This is fucking reality. Cobb’s top is not spinning at this point. I look away, north bound I-55, look back. Second impression is setting in. Look at that face. Then the eyes, finally her collar. I remember why she’s on my top slammy list. This lady’s got it. By it, I mean my boner wrapped around her little finger. Although she now reminds me of an elf, I would still sell the farm for a one way ticket to Poundtown. The good thing about all this is how great humans are at growing hair on their skull.

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BRISCUITS

As if I need any more reason to lather butter all over a biscuit, this butter had apricot jam mixed in. I had to restrain myself. The biscuit was warm, soft and sweet, like I like my women. In other words, women are biscuits.

Meat and 3. Joe Staler says Nashville, TN is the world Capitol for Meat and 3. Biscuits and Blues is nowhere near Nash but had a mighty fine lunch spread. I NEVER order lima beans so I obviously had to step on out there. Squash tasted of butter and the green beans were tasty, but not remarkable. The chop was meaty with light marinade.

Conclusion

I’d recommend Biscuits and Blues to anyone who digs Meat and 3. Bring a handkerchief because Natchez is humid. Do yourself a favor and get an extra biscuit, lather it up too.

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Southern Pecan by Lazy Magnolia
3 tamales covered in chili onions cheese and japs. Mexican cornbread
Crystal Hot Sauce

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